Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Post-Game Show

Beside the Apollo 11 moon landing and 9-11, Barack Obama's election as president last night was among the most historic events to occur in my lifetime (thus far).

Just watching the energy of his win boil across Grant Park--then the country, and the world—was incredible. Obama's critics can downplay his appeal as much as they want; he is no Messiah, he is a leader.

For his part, John McCain—whacked in the electoral college—was a gracious runner-up. Despite the many flaws of his campaign, none can dismiss McCain's service to this country.

As for Caribou Barbie, after coming off as so cocky in the RNC convention, it was a pleasure seeing her served a two-ton dollop of humility.

How's it feel to get pwned by a community organizer, guv?

Otherwise, here a few more follow-ups:

Joe The Plumber - Your 15 minutes expired three weeks ago. Go home and get a fucking job.

Joe Biden – Enjoy your new digs at the Naval Observatory. However, I think it would be best for everyone if you kept quiet for the next four years.

The Obama Kids – Have fun, and consider adopting your new White House dog from a local area shelter.

George W. Bush and Dick Cheney – Get the fuck out now. You needn't wait until January 20th. Just go. We'll mail you your stuff. As is, Obama's going to have to kill 25 chickens in the Oval Office to rid the place of your bad mojo.

Barney and Beasley Bush – You can stick around.

Joe Lieberman – How's it feel to be fresh out of friends?

Sean Hannity – I'll give it to you, Slanthead. Your constant attempts to tar Obama with lame associations from Bill Ayres to his third-grade commie math teacher were tireless, and all for naught. But don't worry – they'll be more than enough crap that you and Mark Levin can still hurl at Obama from your foxhole in future days.

Rush Limbaugh – Having listened to you off and on during the final weeks of the election, I must say your attacks on Obama—and water-toting for McCain and Palin--were extremely weak. All those drugs you popped must have addled your brain worse than we thought.

Jerome Corsi – You are a sad, pathetic, 300-pound man.

Sen. Libby "Godless Americans" Dole (R-NC) – I am delighted that you lost. Your last-ditch tactics against Kay Hagen were revolting.

Utah-based opponents of California's Proposition 8 (Barring Gay Marriage) – Congratulations. Let homophobia ring.

The Voters of Alaska (Re: The Re-Election of Newly-Minted Felon
Ted Stevens) – What the hell is wrong with you people? Seriously.

Jim Oberweis – Gee, you just can't buy an election can you?

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