This past Saturday, I got a collections notice from an agency in Washington State claiming to work for the Clerk’s Office of Dupage County, Illinois – this, in the matter of $169.00 the agency claimed I owed them over a traffic ticket dating back to 1998.
Yes, that’s right. Nine years ago.
As soon as I read this notice, my spider-sense immediately went off.
After all, do these idiots seriously expect me to believe that—were this claim legit, and I indeed never paid my original fine—that the Illinois DMV would have renewed my license twice since ’98 without receiving any kind of notice that matters were out of sorts?
In response, thinking I was dealing with a boiler room operation, I tore up the “collection agency’s” letter. But to cover my bases, I called the local County Clerk’s office today to see what was up – if anything.
Here’s the short version of the outcome: I was told that the original check I wrote to cover the 1998 fine bounced (which is not unbelievable as I had financial troubles that year), and I had to repay the full $169.00 now.
Yet when I asked the office guy why the hell it took his office nine full years to discover this error, I was told the government is an incredibly complex machine and that mistakes do happen.
Gee, I wonder if I skimp on this fine how long it’ll take the powers-that-be to figure it out again?
Another nine years? That would be 2016. So I figure if I play my cards right, and I can stretch together enough nine-year intervals, I’ll be nice and dead before the Clerk’s Office figures out what’s happening. And if so, woo-hoo!
Eat it, suckers!
2 comments:
. . .if I play my cards right, and I can stretch together enough nine-year intervals . . .
it'll be like Rip Van Winkle's snooze bar. Hope they don't decide to start charging interest.
I'll pay it sooner or later, preferably later.
Screw 'em, I say! Screw 'em all!
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